Until Every One Comes Home

Until Every One Comes Home

That’s the slogan for the United Service Organization, which is more familiarly known by its acronym, USO. Established by President Roosevelt in 1941, the USO provides morale and welfare support to U.S. troops and their families, around the world. The nonprofit organization is congressionally chartered and relies on the generosity of individuals, organizations and corporations to support its activities.

At my location, the USO is known for their phones and internet. We have a USO tent, referred to as a “USO in a Box” that includes over a dozen phones and wireless internet. The phones are free to use. You simply sit down, dial 1 plus the area code, and just like in the states the phone starts ringing on the other end. If no one is waiting to use a phone, then talk all you want. Otherwise, they ask you to limit your calls to 30 minutes. A conventional American cell phone would charge about $4 a minute. A local cell phone would charge about 25-cents a minute. Either way, it adds up, and having free phone use 24/7 is a great amenity.

The USO tent also provides free wireless internet, and has a few desks where one can park themselves and surf the web, or Skype. The bandwidth and USO tent can get crowded in the evenings, so as long as the locals aren’t burning tires to heat their homes, you can sit outside as well and still get wireless internet.

Technology has changed the way we live, even in some of the most remote places on earth. Providing internet access to troops is something the USO recognized it needed to keep up with in order to remain relevant as an organization. But there is one thing the USO has done for almost 70 years that is still as valid today as it was in 1941.  USO Tours.

Most of us remember seeing Bob Hope on TV entertaining a crowd of troops in some far off place. That tradition continues. Yesterday (Friday Dec. 17) the USO Tour paid us a visit, with a pretty big star - Robin Williams. It was his fifth tour with the USO.

Besides Robin Williams, comedian Lewis Black (one of my favorites), singer Kix Brooks (Brooks & Dunn), country music songwriter Bob Dipiero (who I discovered after the fact was born in Youngstown), comedian Kathleen Madigan, and cyclist Lance Armstrong also were in attendance. Their visit was brief (perhaps 2 hours) but considering there’s not much else on the compound besides the USO tent, it was a welcome reprieve from a normal Friday.

Williams, Madigan, Black, Brooks, Depiero and Armstrong with the 2-Star General

Robin Williams entertaining us.

After some introductions by our 2-Star General, Robin Williams took the stage for a bit. Some of his funny one-liners (that I edited for language):

“So they told us to turn our watches back 30 minutes when we land in Kabul. What? Are you kidding? You need to turn your clocks back 200 years when you’re here!”

“I’ve inhaled so must dust here the past day I crapped an adobe brick.”

“This place is far out there, when we landed, the voice on my GPS said, ‘whoa, where the f&*$ are we?”

Same time as previous pic from a different angle. Camera magic.

I’ve loaded a 30 second, un-edited clip, of his performance to my YouTube channel. Don’t view it if easily offended by profanity.


MichaelJKraynak You Tube Channel

After a 10 minute performance the stars moved into the dining hall where they lined us all up for an assembly line of photos.

Robin holding court with me and my friends.

It was quick, it was funny, and it was nice. The stars donate their time to do this. The USO pays for transportation, lodging, logistics, etc. They’ve done it for 70 years and will continue to do so Until Every One Comes Home.